To drink or not to drink, what is a gal to do?

By: Ornit Avidar, former Israeli Economic Attache in Hong Kong, Partner ICVC Venture fund 

Recently we were invited to the Chinese Economic and Commercial Counselor in Israel for dinner and as always the bottles of alcohol (Moutai - Chinese liquor, especially) were being pored lavishly.

 

Having a Chinese dinner is really great fun, meeting new people, eating good food, and drinking. While I personally like my occasional glass of wine and alcohol and I might even drink more than one, even I, who likes to drink, can not totally commit to the expectations of drinking and bonding under Chinese culture.

Drinking in China is a very significant part of bonding; this is a way to check out your partner and to create a strong relationship. The drinking part is actually very clever. The logic behind this is the following: Only after one takes off their work/professional mask, allowing oneself to be relaxed and truthful, only then, can you really see, who is the person behind the mask. Drunkenness is a kind of a truth serum in which you can measure a man or woman as to their integrity, and see how they behave without keeping up appearances.

So, back to our opening question, does a woman have to participate in this custom?
First of all, when doing business with (Chinese) women this is not a problem, because apparently women all over the world drink less and bonding through drinking is not an issue. (We bond through stories about our children, child raising and occasionally shopping).
But, as usual, a lot of the business is still done with men and here I find that some are very insistent that women participate in the custom and some are less understanding.

According to my experience, you should probably agree to at least one drink and make it last for the whole night; this is a matter of curtsy and showing a willingness to cooperate.
I usually stop after the second or third and politely decline additional "Gambay" (the Chinese word for "bottoms up")From my experience I can testify that it is usually accepted by my Chinese hosts who then exert more pressure on my male partners (this is an additional female perk…).

To sum things up, as usual in business, be attentive to the cultural traits and habits of your business partner but stick with your business integrity and fit with your personality.

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